Tuesday, February 02, 2010

What I Saw On the Street: SIGNS OF THE APOCALPYSE

How is that Madison Avenue continues to come up with New products. Just when you thought chocolate milk was as stable and nostalgic as an After School Special, they go and invent Chocolate Flavoring Straws. Not flavorED mind you, but flavoring. Screw nouns, these folks have moved right in verbs.



Your food product will now flavor other food products! This is the most exciting development since perhaps GOOBER, the peanut-butter/jelly hybrid jarred foodspread of the 1970's, or the do-it-yourself salsa/chili/Velveeta party dip.




I'm not much of a football fan, but maybe I can make an attept to slyly enter straight-guy sports-world by bringing some Flava-Straws to a SuperBowl party this weekend. It's sure to pursuade everyone that I'm with it, that I'm hip, that I'm so Lady-Gaga-NOW, right? Right!!?? Oh, wait, Lady Gaga's not a straight-male reference? Oh, no. I'm doomed! Doomed!

Now get back to your books!